


Crushing Defeat

by ShibbyMo



Category: South Park
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-02
Updated: 2019-09-21
Packaged: 2020-10-05 22:17:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20496218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShibbyMo/pseuds/ShibbyMo
Summary: Stan has come to realize that he has a crush on his best friend... can he overcome this feeling and save their friendship? Or will he throw it all away?





	1. The Struggle

The raven haired male sighed heavily as he pulled his iconic blue tuque on his head. He looked at himself in the mirror.

“Any second now….” He didn’t budge from looking into the bathroom mirror. Within seconds there was a knock on the front door. “Like clockwork.” Stan Marsh headed out to the front door and opened it, welcoming his best friend.

“Hey, Kyle.”

“Morning, Stan. Ready for the math quiz today?”

“Aw shit… I forgot all about it….”

“It’s cool, Man. You can copy off my quiz sheet.”

“You are a lifesaver, seriously.”

“C’mon, the guys are waiting at the bus stop already.” Kyle turned and headed for the bus stop. Stan walked next to the green hatted teen.

Cartman and Kenny were already waiting at the bus stop that the four boys had stood at for so many years.

Cartman glanced over and pointed at the two teens and laugh. “Walking side-by-side??? Gaywads!”

“Ha ha… like you haven’t been saying that for years.” Stan rolled his eyes.

“Seriously, Cartman, come up with some new material already.” Kyle frowned.

“Yeah well… Shut up, Stupid Jew!”

“Whatever, Fatass.” The redhead got out as the bus pulled up, rendering Cartman silent instead of being yelled at by Ms. Crabtree.

Stan sat next to Kyle and almost instantly fell asleep on the way to school. It wasn’t long that Kyle was gently shaking his best friend.

“Stan, hey, Stan… wake up. You alright?”

Stan slowly opened his eyes and looked at the other teen, “Kyle?” He looked directly into his eyes and blushed deeply. He jumped up suddenly and ran out of the bus and made a B-line for the bathroom. He locked himself in a stall and covered his face. “You idiot… You absolute idiot!” 

Kyle stared at the now empty seat next to him. “Um…?” He sighed and got up and headed for his locker with Cartman and Kenny. “Have you guys noticed Stan acting weird at all?”

“Besides him being a total pussy?” Cartman laughed.

“Ohmf hmfuf nomff-“

“Kenny, put the stupid hood down, I’m tired of trying to decode your muffles.” Kyle pinched the bridge of his nose.

Kenny huffed and put the hood down, revealing his shoulder length blond hair. “I haven’t noticed anything.”

“Maybe it’s just me… Let’s just get to class.” 

Stan managed to calm himself down and headed for the classroom. Even though they were now in high school the classroom never seemed to change. He took his seat and rubbed his head. 

“Hey, Stan. Are you feeling alright?”

“Yeah. I’m fine, why?”

“You just seem off is all.” He shrugged. “Whatever.”

Class went by slower than hell. Stan was watching as every minute ticked by. By the end of the day he was twitching worse than Tweak. The bell rang and he raced out the door. He ended up on the bus first and paused. 

“Well that was really stupid.”

“I’ll say. Why the fuck did you just run out the door like that?”

“I just… I really want to be home today.” He sighed.

“Okay? Are you sick or something?”

“Yeah… Something like that.”

“The why did you come to school today?? I don’t want to catch whatever you are carrying!”

“Sorry man. Don’t pick me up tomorrow, I will stay home.”

“Alright, Man…” 

The two remained silent for the ride back home. Stan got off the bus calmly this time and headed for his house without saying anything more to Kyle, fearing what might come out fo his mouth at this point.

“It would be so much easier if I knew he was gay too.” He muttered, walking to his bedroom. “Fuck my life….”


	2. An Inside Sick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ike sheds some light Kyle's way.

Kyle sat at his desk and started working on his homework. He frowned and just tapped his pencils against his desk. He was focused on the papers in front of him until his little brother Ike walked into the room.

“Hi, Kyle!” He grinned. The adopted brother was now in 5th grade, but he continued to follow Kyle wherever he could. 

“Hey, Ike. Did you have fun at school today?”

“Yeah. I have a girlfriend!” He grinned.

“Again?”

“Mhm! Her name is Jessica!” He hopped on his brother’s bed. “Did you have fun today?”

“Nah. Class was boring… heads up… there are letters in math now…”

“I knew that already... Is something else bothering you?”

The redhead sighed and took off his green hat, setting it aside. “Stan was acting really weird today…. Said he felt sick? He didn’t look it though.”

“Maybe it was an inside sick.”

“An inside sick?”

“Yeah. Like his brain is sick.” The raven haired boy leaned forward. “There is a kid in my class and their brain gets sick sometimes. They stay home. Sometimes they are gone for a couple days and sometimes a week. But they come back and they look like they feel better.”

“Do they act funny when their brain gets sick?”

“They get really quiet… They won’t even play at recess. It’s like they just want to be alone for awhile.”

“Ike… is this classmate of yours depressed?”

“Mhm. Maybe Stan is too.” He got up and started walking towards the door. “Sometimes my classmate just likes someone to sit with them. Maybe Stan would like that too.” He left the room.

“Stan… depressed…?” Kyle stared at his homework again. He remembered a time that Stan was diagnosed with depression by the Scientologists. “That… wasn’t true though.” He huffed. “God Dammit.” He threw down his pencil and put his hat back on before heading for the front door.

His mom was in the living room. “Kyle, where are you going? Have you finished you homework?”

“I’ll finish it later, Mom. I have to go see Stan.” He left the house before she could object.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Totally meant to post this chapter earlier! Apologies! I hope you enjoyed!


	3. GTFO!!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyle just wants to help his friend...

Stan finished his homework quickly as he always does before he started to warm up the water to take a shower. Just as he climbed under the water his mom gently knocked on the bathroom door.

“Stan… Kyle is here to see you. He says it is really important. Will you be long?”

“Can you tell him I’m not feeling good?? I just really want to be alone right now.”

“He said you would say that then said that he really needed to see you.” She didn’t dare tell her son that Kyle was standing outside the door with her. 

“Fine… Tell him to wait for me in my room. I’ll be out in a minute.”

“Okay, Stanley.” She looked at Kyle and nodded before walking to the other teens bedroom.

Stan groaned and let his head gently tap the wall of the shower. He let out a heavy sigh. “Fuck….”

“STANLEY! LANGUAGE!”

“GET OUT OF HERE, MOM!” He clenched his fists and stomped his foot. “Jeeze why are you just standing out there??”

“I want to make sure my baby boy is okay.”

“I’m fine…. just… let me shower for crying out loud.” He started to actually wash up and shower. 

While Stan was cleaning up from the day, Kyle was sitting on his bed. He looked around the room. It hadn’t changed much over the years. There were a few new posters that replaced the Terrance and Phillip posters on the walls. The bookshelf was still more filled with comic books than novels, though a few copies of young adult novels had found their way into the mix. He gently fixed a wrinkle on the blue comforter he was sitting on. “Stan just tell me what’s wrong…” He said to himself before the scent of Irish Spring caught his attention. He glanced up to see his best friend standing in the door with the towel on.

“I told you I wasn’t feeling well…” He muttered as he walked over to the dresser and pulled out boxers and pajamas.

Kyle opened his mouth to speak up, but was clearly caught off guard seeing Stan in nothing but a towel. That mixed with the aroma of the body wash had intoxicated the Jewish boy. He closed his mouth and cleared his throat. “You… didn’t look sick.” He shook his head slightly. “Sorry, football did good things for you didn’t it?”

Stan paused and raised a brow before looking at Kyle. “What was that?”

“I-I mean… No homo or anything… but you look really good.”

“Right. No homo.” He stepped in to the closet to get dressed before he sat at his desk and faced Kyle. “So you just came over here to see if I was really sick or not?”

“Yes… no…. When you say it like that it sounds wrong.”

“It isn’t?”

Instead of playing the back and forth he decided to blurt out the real question he wanted to ask, “Stan are you depressed??”

Stan stared calmly for a second before taking a breath. “You could say that.”

“I could say that you are depressed? What does that even mean…?”

“I really don’t want to share that detail with you.” Stan crossed his arms.

“You don’t want to- Stan I am your best friend! You really can’t talk to me about whatever this is??”

“Please leave….”

“No! Not until you tell me what this crap is!”

“GET OUT, KYLE!!!!”

“Fine! I didn’t want to help you anyway!” The shorter teen got up from the bed and stormed out of the bedroom.

Stan sat at his desk for another minute before crawling into bed and closing his eyes.


	4. Crushing Defeat Becomes Utter Relief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time to open the closet.

The following week the two, now former, best friends avoided all contact. At the bus stop they stood on the ends, with Cartman and Kenny standing between them. On the bus they sat on opposite ends. In class they asked to change seating positions so they’d no longer be sitting next to each other. 

It wasn’t until Friday that Kyle finally said something… or rather screamed.

“ALRIGHT! I AM TIRED OF THIS!” He stomped his foot and looked at Stan. “WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM???”

Stan blinked and stared at the red-faced teen. “I’m not doing this. I have a game tonight.”

“I know you do! And I want to go, but I am not going to if you are still mad at me for asking what was wrong with you!” He crossed his arms.

“You really want to know, Kyle? You really want to know what is wrong with me?”

“YES!! THAT IS ALL I WANTED THE ENTIRE WEEK THAT YOU HAVE BEEN AVOIDING ME!”

“I’ll tell you but you need to stop screaming. Broom closet… 10 minutes.” He walked away calmly.

“Fina- broom closet?” He shook off the doubt and headed for the broom closet.

In ten minutes Stan was there. He pushed the shorter teen into the room before anyone could see them. “Swear to me, that whatever I say to you… it will not ruin our friendship.”

“I promise. It won’t ruin whatever we have left that we call a friendship.” Kyle crossed his arms again. “Now, what’s wrong??”

“I like you…” He muttered so quietly it came out more like, “Er urk ur.”

“Come again?”

The raven haired teen huffed. “I… have…. a crush….” He took a deep breath.

“On Wendy? Aren’t you two done?”

“Christ would you let me finish??” Stan groaned. “Kyle… I have a crush… on you.”

Kyle stood still with wide eyes. “You… have a crush... on me…?”

“Yes…”

“For how long…?”

“I dunno… forever I guess.”

Kyle looked down. “Huh.”

“Huh? I come out to you… and I get… ‘huh’?? What kind of friend are you?” Stan furrowed his brows before he hear the other start chuckling. “Why are you laughing?”

“Think of the irony here… You are coming out of the closet… IN a closet!” He laughed harder.

“Is that all that matters to you right now? Seriously? Not the fact that your best friend has had a crush on you for god knows how long?”

“You know… I always thought you were the smart one in our group… turns out you are a dumbass just like the rest of us.”

“And what does that mean?”

Instead of saying anything Kyle leaned in and kissed Stan gently on the lips. “We both need to come out of the closet I guess.”

Stan blushed. “You mean…?”

“Yeah.” He smiled. “Now… are you going to get ready for the game? Or are we going to hide in here all night, forcing the team to forfeit allowing the rest of the class to hate your guts until we graduate?”

“You make it sound so appealing to stay in this nasty broom closet.” Stan chuckled and quickly left and ran out to the locker rooms to prepare for the game.

\------------

South Park won the game by a landslide and Kyle waited for Stan by the main exit as he always had in the past. “Stan, you wanna go to Shaky’s?”

“Fuck yeah I wanna go to Shaky’s.”

Kyle just caught softly. “You are starting to sound like Cartman.”

“Shut up, Ky-ehl. Stupid Jew!” Stan said in his best Cartman impression. Causing the other teen to crack up laughing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for reading this story!! I really hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!


End file.
